Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Jazz Hands

Dear Parker:
What is with all the hand movements?  It is like trying to get the paper towels to advance in the automatic paper towel dispensers. 
When you wait too long to wake up to eat and then you are hysterical with hunger, waving your hands around your face and stuffing them in your mouth doesn't help me feed you.  I can't get the nipple in your mouth when both hands are in there halfway to your elbows.  Thank goodness your mom gave up on the hand mitten thing though I have noticed you are not adverse to sticking your sleeves in your mouth too. 
Secondly-- Yes you have a penis and we all know how entertaining those are.  Waiting to go peepee until someone has your diaper off and is focused on cleaning you up may seem like the perfect time to shoot a stream right in their face but, as you have discovered, you may actually succeed in peeing in your own mouth.  Also it forces us to take all your clothes off (AGAIN) and put dry ones one which usually makes you all upset too.  And the same thing about poop.  Remember, actions have consequences.
Especially important these days:  please do not use your Vulcan mind meld psychic powers to influence grandma into buying you cool toys.  Every now and then is okay but.... really, did you NEED that Spiderman back pack???



ltlrags said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ltlrags said...

Hey, Miss Vocabulary. Lesson for the day:

As in, "I'm averse to telling people that they misused a word because of the possibility of an adverse reaction."