I was wishing my Best Boyfried Wayne a Happy 50th birthday today when we got to talking about how different things are than we expected them to be by the time we hit the Big 5-0 in 2012. The first thing to come to mind are flying cars. If you had told our 12 year old selves (which was the age we were when we first became friends) that when we were 50 years old-- in a future far, far, FAAAAARRRRR away-- that we would still be driving gas powered cars ON THE GROUND I don't think we would have believed you. And no jet packs either!
I distinctly remember writing a paper about the benefits of nuclear power and was confident that safe, clean nuclear power was destined in the future. Of course, this was shortly before the Cold War started. As I became an adult I thought I was Hot Stuff because I had a pager (and that was only because I was newly divorced and controlled my brutally bitter tongue best that way). Only very rich people had mobile phones and those were attached to a cord and were the size of a shoe box! I was ecstatic to get a hand-me-down word processor. DOS. A few years later I first started hearing about The World Wide Web but I brushed it off as the dorkish fantasy of Dungeon and Dragon geeks.
So today Wayne hit the half century mark-- just a few days after my ex-husband and just a few days before it is my turn. And Wayne took his car to work. Not his personal jet pack. Not a FLYING CAR-- and Scotty did not beam him anywhere either. We still don't know what reeeeealy happened at Roswell and while we eventually found out Who Shot JR, we still aren't sure that Lee Harvey acted by himself now are we?
So if 50 year old Wayne sat down with 12 year old Wayne and broke the news about the appalling lack of flying cars I wonder how that shock might be softened by the Glory of having not just one but several computers of his own and one that he carries in his pocket that he uses to swype secret silent messages with 49.9 year old LeAnn while we are at work with no one the wiser. After work 50 year old Wayne comes home to watch TV IN COLOR and have a choice of thousands of channels that stay on 24 hours a day and which hangs on the WALL so he isn't stuck watching bowling on the Wide World Of Sports on Sunday afternoons.
And, as if all of this were not cool enough he could tell shrimpy 12 year old Wayne that he was going to be very very tall and very handsome.
But.... no flying cars......
I hope you still had a Happy Birthday! Lots of Love!