CAN YOU HEAR ME?
Cuz there is this incredibly LOUD alarm going off.
REALLY REALLY LOUD!
It usually goes off around 10:00pm and it scared us the first few times. We assumed that it was the emergency door alarm for the nearby strip mall because when you go outside it is impossible to tell where it is coming from.
I SAID: IT IS SO LOUD IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO TELL WHERE IT IS COMING FROM!
One day Lauren and I got in the car to track it down. We went to the around the corner to the new house but it was fine. We drove to the Vallarta Market (Arriba, Arriba) figuring it had to be the back entrance-- but no esta la porta de Emergencia de Vallarta!! So we drive around and as we approach home we realize-- it is our neighbor's house alarm. And they set it off often.
The other thing that is irritating me right this exact moment in time is the lender for our new house. We are now smack dab in the middle of the 'Do you want the loan? Do you want it? Go get it!! Get the loan!!' (ala when you tease a dog with a toy) "Please jump through this hoop. Okay now we are going to set it on fire-- jump now. We need you to put your left baby toe in your right ear. Now jump up and down and sing the National Anthem.
When will the loan close? What? I CAN"T HEAR YOU THERE IS A HOUSE ALARM GOING OFF IN MY EAR? Close what? WHAT???? I am sorry I will have to hang up now, ignore your emails and neglect to call you back for a day or so unless I want something.
And, Thank You For Doing Business With Bank Of America Home Loan Department!!"