Tuesday, October 9, 2012


Have you ever thought about what a strange thing 'Sleep' is?  (pardon the dangling participle there you grammar Nazis)

My cats and the dog are real pros at sleeping.  They do so for most of the day (ie: 24 hour period of time not just the daytime).  Upon observance I find that they often change locations or postures several times but mostly just settle back down and snooze away. 
Humans commonly decide at some point to find a comfortable spot (usually their bed but sometimes alternative places such as the couch, the car, the work desk, the toilet) and put themselves into a coma-like state during which time they apparently download all kinds of unnecessary memories and random thoughts that result in weird dreams.  At some point humans bring themselves back out of the coma.  HOW BIZARRE IS THAT??  Then the whole process starts over again.

Of course it isn't always quite so simple.  Sometimes the dreams thrust themselves too far up and roust us from our slumber.  I often have dreams that someone is calling me for help.  This isn't out of the realm of possibility for me since we have Ms Seizure and Ms 8.5 months pregnant in the house.  This time felt so real that I actually launched myself across the room and into the hallway trying to figure out who was calling only to realize several moments later that I was the only one awake.  A few days ago I woke up because I think I heard some sort of thing outside which, upon reflection, sounded like the Tardis.  DO YOU THINK IT WAS THE TARDIS?????  (If you don't even know what that is.... for shame you Non-Whovians)(Google it--- don't embrace ignorace)

I don't get good sleep.  I do comatize myself early enough but apparently I have that nasty scourge of the obese--- apnea--  and it makes my sleep unproductive.  I know I have this because other housemates swear that I snore like a buzzsaw and I occasionally stop breathing only to gasp for air.  This actually has woken me up before so I believe it.  Next week I have a sleep study which means I have to go to this clinic where they will drill holes into my head to hook up electrodes then make me sleep naked in a room with double mirrors so they can laugh and take videos.  Also, they reserve the right to draw things on my forehead with sharpie markers and broadcast farts on the radio.
The other sleep issue I have is that the chronic shoulder and neck pain I have wakes me up sometimes and makes it impossible to get comfortable.  Have you ever seen how birds sleep?  My childhood parakeet, Glory, would turn his head 180 degrees around and tuck his beak between his shoulders.  Not only that but he then tucked one foot up into his feathers!  HOW COOL IS THAT?????  I often wonder.... did his neck hurt?  Did he need little birdy physical therapy????

So whine whine whine.....

Yesterday I went to my second physical therapy session (well this go round anyhow) and my PT showed me how to make a roll out of a towel and sleep with this around my neck like the pillows they use on airplanes.  It was a miracle.  Or maybe coincidence.  But regardless.... I slept last night.  And today was the first day in longer than I can remember that I was awake in the morning at work without nodding off or feeling groggy. I didn't feel so anxious that I had to go out in the desert and throw up just to get myself braced to go to work. I didn't have to take a nap at lunch.  I don't feel depressed or slow or tired.  Amazing.
I can only hope this is setting a trend!

1 comment:

ltlrags said...

You've stolen my sleep. Your mornings sound like mine until a year ago, but I've been sleeping like a baby for most of the last year. Until you nabbed my sheep, and now I have nothing to count. Enjoy your sleep study.